The Quick Brown Fox jumped over the Lazy Dog.
He didn’t really realize he was fast, or even brown for that matter. And if you were to ask the dog, he would be quite offended if you were to call him lazy. Even though he was.
He was getting quite sick of it, actually – this stupid fox, who was quite quick (and brown) always jumping over him. His pathetic attempts to thwart the Quick Brown Fox’s repeated jumps over him were compromised, however, on account of his laziness.
Once he slept right through it. Another time, he simply couldn’t be bothered to raise his head. Still another time, he was happily enjoying a great dinner of leftover Filet, when that Quick Brown Fox jumped right over him and ran away. It was always like that, and the Lazy Dog was not happy with it. And to reiterate, he would have done something about it, too…had he not been so very lazy.
The fox, however, was quite enjoying himself. Though – as mentioned – he didn’t know he was fast (or brown), he WAS aware that he was doing something deliciously wrong, that – by running into this manicured yard and jumping over this lazy, stupid dog – he was somehow making up for years of being the type of fox who always came home on time, and never upset his parents. When other foxes were running to get into the henhouses, or interrupting some backyard barbecue, the quick, brown fox was always home by curfew, always ready to help his mother, always fetching things for his father. He would hear his parents at dinner parties, raving about what a good little fox he was and how lucky they were that he wasn’t a problem – not like poor Gary Fox’s little one, who had impregnated his cousin and was hooked on heroin.
No, the Quick Brown Fox was always a paragon of good behavior.
So it was with great relish that, one night, upon a challenge from his little fox friends, he ran into this yard and jumped over this dog. After that first night – after feeling the thrill of being so bad, of doing something that was so annoying to another creature and so rewarding to his friends – he couldn’t resist. He returned again and again, always finding a way to jump over this dog – who, though he resented being called “lazy,” was certainly on the inert side, as far as dogs go.
Sometimes the Quick Brown Fox even felt a pang sympathy. Really, it became so easy after a while to jump over such a lazy dog – what was the point, even? But the Quick Brown Fox continued to jump over the lazy dog.
You would think that eventually, the Quick Brown Fox would grow tired of such a pointless exercise, or that the Lazy Dog, frustrated and annoyed and embarrassed by this Fox who kept jumping over him, would take some action and rebel against his lazy nature.
But you would be wrong. For the Quick Brown Fox jumped and jumped over that Lazy Dog, day after day, month after month, through all the seasons. And as the years went by, the Quick Brown Fox jumped more and more, and the Lazy Dog grew lazier and lazier. They came to understand that they were somehow meant for each other, that there was some sort of higher purpose in their seemingly random and quite bizarre interaction.
What this purpose was, or is, neither the Quick Brown Fox nor the Lazy Dog could say, but both, by their actions, gave their silent acknowledgment that a purpose did, indeed, exist.
And with this realization, with the recognition that their actions were how inspired by things greater than us all, came the realization that all would be right in the world so long as they continued their Quick and Lazy dance.
And so, forever after, the Quick Brown Fox jumped over the Lazy Dog.