Jonathan Light

Writer. Director. Producer.

Page 2 of 5

Nausea sucks

And not even just the thing – even the word sucks. Who came up with that word? I feel slightly nauseous and then just saying the word out loud makes me feel even more nauseous. It’s one of those words that looks and sounds EXACTLY like what it is, isn’t it?

Fun grammatical fact: the correct word to convey the state-of-being of nausea is actually “nauseated” – so I should have written “I feel nauseated.” But now I’m even more nauseated, because I just realized I’m being THAT guy. Sometimes you just gotta let these things slide.

Other than that, I’m doing well enough after my third treatment on Thursday. The last two days have been not the best – I’m fatigued and feeling really “off” – but I’m functional enough. There’s some soreness from the magical white-blood cell shot Neulasta [see our ad on the Sunday morning shows!] but that should pass soon as well. Hopefully the next 13 days will be uneventful – each day farther away from the chemo day is better, so I just have to hang on until the next one.

The nurses were very happy to see me with all my hair, but they were skeptical that it would last much longer. I explained to them that very few things on this planet can conquer my Jew-Fro, so we’ll see who wins this battle.

And, as always, if for some reason this isn’t a detailed enough update for you, please call/write/whatever. It’s been wonderful to hear from everybody, and the support and outreach has been just epic. I’m very, very grateful.

 

 

 

 

 

Mid-Cycle Respite

First of all, my neighbors – the exquisite collection of families that make up Harvard Terrace – have been delivering meals to us, unannounced and unsolicited, and I just feel they need a special mention so that whoever’s reading this knows just how wonderful people can be – and in the NJ suburbs no less.

So to everyone who was all, “how can you move out of NYC?” I ask you: would this have happened in a co-op in Brooklyn? No. They probably would have been worried that a cancer patient in their building would bring their share value down. [Zing. Unfair, I know…]

As for me, I’m actually doing surprisingly well, to the point where I feel a bit guilty for not being more sick so I can feel worthy of all this help and support. The only major side effect is being tired all the time, but I also have a two-year-old so that would happen anyway.

I do wish I was able to pick him up as much as I used to, and he is sometimes a little confused about why I can’t run around with him – but – again – this is hopefully all just temporary.

Next chemo treatment is this coming Thursday, so I have a few days of being fine before I re-enter the Post-Chemo Two-to-Three-Day Window of Gloom and Nausea. But – again – if this pattern holds, and if this is as bad as it gets for the next five months, I’ll be very happy.

As for the biggest question, of course: hair loss has been minimal, just some strands coming out in the shower every day. Nothing my Jew-fro can’t vanquish so far.

And I’ve decided that I really like writing blog posts because – unlike in screenwriting  – you don’t have to come up with a satisfying ending.

 

Post-Chemo #2

Chemo was last Thursday, and somehow, I’m really doing fine. The weekend was a bit of a struggle, but it was a busy family weekend so I probably pushed a little harder than I would have.

I feel weak and a little queasy all the time, but for the most part I’ve been very lucky. If I felt like this just because I was sick, nobody would care since it would probably be gone in a few days.  But if this is the worst it gets for the next six months, I’ll be very happy.

Although there were a few strands of hair on my pillow…………..[ominous music]. Rachel is dreading that part of it, since she only loves me for my hair, but I’ll actually feel a bit cheated if I don’t get to see what I’d look like completely bald.

Since I won’t be able to climb…

Might as well make room for the next generation.

IMG_4843

Not a cancer blog

This is NOT a cancer blog. I do not set out to motivate everyone with my positive attitude or any perceived fortitude in the face of this thing – although if that is a byproduct of my writing, I’d be very happy.

And please don’t take that as a criticism of any other kinds of writing from people going through this…  I only submit this disclaimer because I don’t think anything I write could be as motivational or inspiring as some other essays and blogs I’ve read. So if you want to be inspired by real strength in the face of adversity, please go here.  Or here.  Or ESPECIALLY here…this is an essay by an old high school friend whose story is everything all at once. These writers are doing it much better than I ever will.

For my purposes, I figured that since my website was already up and running, it would be a good, non-Facebook place to post updates on things as they progress during my treatment – a place where friends, family and weird stalkers with a disturbing interest in strangers’ chemotherapy treatments can check in and get updates.

Mostly, though, I’m doing this so I don’t have to write the same email seven hundred and forty-eight times. I mean, seriously. There are a LOT of you. When did I get so many friends? I’m so confused.

So please visit here whenever you’d like for updates and the occasional Deep Thought during those times when I’m hopped up on Percocet. BUT please don’t take this to mean that I don’t want you to call, write and/or visit. I have loved hearing from everyone and it really, really helps. As I’ve said to many people, cancer is a GREAT opportunity to really connect with people in ones life, so might as well take advantage of it.

And though you will hear this from me a lot, I can’t help but repeat it over and over: thank you all so, so very much. The outpouring of support and offers to help and exclamations of “what the hell did you have to go and LYMPHOMA for?” have been overwhelmingly touching, and I am so very grateful. So many people go through this type of thing without a fraction of the love I’ve felt over the last few weeks, and I am incredibly lucky to have all of you in my life.

Yes, even you, Stranger Who Found Me on LinkedIn because you need a videographer for your son’s bar mitzvah. (Also, sorry, I don’t do them.)

SO…the update: My second chemo treatment is tomorrow (Thursday) and I fully expect hair to start showing up on my pillow within the next week. Although – who knows? The thing about chemotherapy is everyone is different, and no one can tell you what will happen.

My doctor – who is awesome – remains very confident that I’ll have a relatively OK time with this, and the bottom line is that my Hodgkins symptoms (which were pretty debilitating) have completely subsided after just one treatment, which is the most important thing. So if I’m lucky, the next six months will consist of mostly normal days punctuated by a few days of feeling slightly rundown after chemo every two weeks. Piece of cake, I hope.

And that’s the latest. I’ve been feeling OK so far, and I’m prepared for whatever may happen in the coming months. I’m sticking to the mantra I’ve always had, which is there is literally nothing in life that is so bad that it can’t be made worse by something else. This helps me keep perspective, which in turn has made room in my brain for some awesomely dark cancer jokes.

Stay tuned for further updates…

An Open Letter to Humans Who Live Today

This was written pseudonymously on Medium, so congrats – if you were wondering who actually wrote it, you’ve found the answer.

Dear People,

After reading the open letters and articles that address standards of living and work ethic, it seems as if all you people think you know everything about everyone just from reading first-person testimonials on this “internet” thing. This is wrong, so I thought it imperative that I give you all the benefit of perspective, from someone who’s been there.

I’m just a little older than you, though not much. I’ll be turning 153 years old next week – and that century-plus can be very important. Just like you, I moved to New York in my 20’s, looking to study typography, which I believe we’re calling graphic design these days, but I was also  set on pursuing my dream of avoiding the roving bands of murderers who wandered my Eastern European country looking for people to kill.

I was lucky enough to have a distant cousin living here – I wrote to him asking for help, and three months later he replied, offering me 20 hours a week as a pickle-delivery-man AND a mattress in the corner of the home/office he shared with forty-seven other people in a 5-floor-walkup in the Tenth Ward. My parents were long dead – one from cholera, the other from the pogrom the week before – but I understood my white privilege was the only thing allowing me to leave. Others in my village weren’t so lucky.

Continue reading

Reasons to Move to Cherry Hill

“Where are you from?”

We’ve all been asked this question. But there is only a small subset of humanity that is able to answer – truthfully – “Exit 4 off the New Jersey Turnpike”

It’s a special person that can reference a dilapidated six-lane superhighway-off-ramp in the heart of Southern New Jersey in their origin story. And you can join this exclusive club by moving to Cherry Hill™, NJ.  Continue reading

Producing things with cameras and stuff

My 2¢:

If you want to make things that have either audio and/or visual components, and you want these things to be good and quality and professional looking, and if you want the process of creating said audio/visual things to be fun and creative and lively and successful, then for the LOVE of GOD treat your crew right.

And if you don’t have a crew, then get one.  Nothing you do will be as good as it would be if you bring in a crew.  And nothing will be more fun and rewarding than being on a set – no matter how small – and creating something with a crew of people who like you and (for the most part) trust you.  But this will only happen if you respect them and put their happiness on a high position of importance on your importance flowchart.

The Fox and the Dog

The Quick Brown Fox jumped over the Lazy Dog.

He didn’t really realize he was fast, or even brown for that matter. And if you were to ask the dog, he would be quite offended if you were to call him lazy. Even though he was.

He was getting quite sick of it, actually – this stupid fox, who was quite quick (and brown) always jumping over him. His pathetic attempts to thwart the Quick Brown Fox’s repeated jumps over him were compromised, however, on account of his laziness. Continue reading

Newly Discovered Myth: Arkamedin

Arkamedin and the Triangle of Love is a little-known* Greek myth.  It’s one of my favorites, but is often overlooked. I publish it here in its entirety.

Arkamedin was a half-man, half god –  born out of a chance encounter between Zeus and a citizen of Greece, a mortal named Antiolitus who worked as a prostitute to the gods.  Usually, before having their way with her, the gods would make Antiolitus infertile for up to 20 minutes, to make it impossible for an illegitimate child to be born.  One night, however, Zeus was incredibly inebriated, and he forgot to cast the spell before calling on Antiolitus for a rendezvous.  The result of their union was Arkamedin.  As soon as Zeus learned of his child, he banished Antiolitus to Hades, and sent Arkamedin to live with an old couple in a hut in the woods.  Arkamedin grew up, oblivious of his true parentage, knowing only the quiet old man who provided ample food and water.

Continue reading

« Older posts Newer posts »

© 2018 Jonathan Light

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑